I’m about to explode if I don’t put this out somewhere - I’m still in serious like with that guy from SO LONG AGO. I MEAN, IF IT WERE TO BE AN INFATUATION IT WOULD BE OVER BY NOW RIGHT?! FUCK.
And why fuck? He doesn’t like me in return. I’m 90% sure. He doesn’t initiate online conversations, no whatsapp, sms, whateverthefuck, none, zero, zilch, next to zero initiation of meet-ups, no ‘hey, wanna catch up? dinner?’ none of that shit. Even when we’re in a CMC convo, he’s nv really into it.
But when we do go out tog, I enjoy his company so much. Why. WHY?! Why does it have to be this way?
Yes, he’s ugly as hell. But who the fuck cares abt that?! I likove his intelligence, his maturity, his ability to see things, situations, clearly, and almost always being right about what to do. He notices the little things, remembers, regurgitates them at the least expected moment, thereby taking you by complete surprise. Doesn’t help that his arm is so fucking nice to lean on, FUCKKK.
I WANT TO YELL. CRY. ARGH.
Above all, I need this to stop. I need to stop and save myself from destruction.
I need help.
And oh, today’s his bday. I already ‘celebrated’ it with him a week in advance, and have wished him again just now. WTF AM I DOING. WHY AM I PUTTING MYSELF THRU THIS?! I need to stop. Just stop contacting him because the ‘seeing a lot of the same person will help you fall out of love with said person’ IS NOT WORKING. It’s the fucking reverse.
Oh god oh god oh god I NEED HELP.
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quid-pro-quo posted this
